The Life of Henry Fuckit
(1950 - 2015)


11   A portrait of the dilettante as a young man

Well above the middle size than below it, Henry's limbs were formed upon the very strongest model that is consistent with agility. However, two points in his person interfered with the rules of symmetry: his shoulders were so broad as to give him something of the air of a man with a short neck; and his arms, tough, round, sinewy, and strong, were so very long as to be rather a deformity.

He was more dark than fair of complexion. Also, he was uncommonly hirsute. Even at that moment, as he issued his founding statement, a mere teenager, his chin showed blue in the electric light, and two vermilion slashes bespoke the toughness of his beard and the maladroitness with which he wielded his safety razor. His forearms and legs were densely flocculent; his chest bristled ferociously; a ventral crest descended from his sternum down his abdomen, over his umbilicus and on netherwards; his armpits were shaggy, as were his pubes; thin black tendrils sparsely covered the rugose surface of his scrotal sac. Only the palms of his hands and the soles of his feet; only part of his face and all of his forehead; only the full extent of his phallus: it was only these areas that were entirely free of hair. Years of tree climbing, swimming in reservoirs, playing soccer with Albert, Frikkie and the Ingachini munts, hurling mud clods at passing traffic up on the Gwelo Road, cycling at breakneck speed over bush tracks and paths - these and lesser pursuits had strengthened and honed his athletic ability.

A strapping hulk of a lad, his facial features were correspondingly strong. His forehead was high and broad, denoting intelligence. His eyes protruded slightly and often appeared glazed - a sure sign of an active imagination. About his eyes already existed creases and wrinkles, the crow's feet denoting humour and a sense of the ironic. A wide mouth with full lips that had a tendency to become engorged when he was emotionally excited, as do the pudenda of maidens in heat - these lips indicated gluttony and lasciviousness. A gap between his two front teeth denoted deviance and stubborn resistance to any form of authority. The jut of his jaw and the facial distortion approximating a sneer, denoted arrogance and cynicism. His eyebrows were heavy and lopsided, inclining to the left, which indicated introversion and detachment. A large, rhamphoid nose was to give rise on numerous occasions to mistaken racial identity. This beak denoted spirituality and an almost complete contempt for material wealth. His eyes were large and wide set and blue-grey. Their colour did not denote anything in particular but they were remarkably transparent and expressive, so much so that their eloquence frequently gave offence, even when he had not uttered a word.

This was Henry Fuckit, on the eve of his departure, about to go out into the big wide world.

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